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Sunday, 24 February 2008

Rock and Roll meets Physiotherapy!

I'd been looking forward to seeing this band for weeks, and to catching up with Andy and Shaun. And as you might already know I love to put on my dancing shoes and make an exhibition of myself.

However...I've had a slight hitch as a couple of days previously I was attacked by the wind!

Again, it's no secret that my daily chores include cleaning up after our lovely Katie (horse) - and I'm a proper little Trojan because I do this in all weathers.
For those of you who are familiar with picking up after horses you will know the tools of the trade. For those who are not I'll try to describe them.... a rake that's hard to describe, but very light, and a scoop that resembles a hood on a stick.

I was working away, I'd emptied several scoops into the wheelbarrow in the field, and was carefully picking my way back through the mud into the top paddock when whooooosh...the wind howled around the corner and picked up the scoop - and me - with such force that I became a kite!
I was momentarily swept off my feet in what seemed like slow motion then dumped down hard right onto a boulder. Would you believe I was surrounded by grass, and mud, but I had to bang my hip on the only sodding boulder!

It didn't hurt at the time, so I got up, laughed about it, and carried on. The wind tried to get me again, but I was ahead of it. It wasn't going to catch me out a second time.
Katie looked somewhat amused by it all - but didn't come to offer any help, but did leave me another deposit!

Yesterday was a different story. I was in pain aaaaaarrrrrrrgggghhhhhh!
But...I was determined I wasn't going to let it spoil my dancing, and it didn't...I had waited too long to see this band.

T-Rex had a support group, so we got an unexpected treat.
And I say treat because you don't always know what you're going to get with a support band. But this group rocked!
They are called 'Helter Skelter'. I understand they come from Huddersfield...look out for them, they deserve bigger things. In fact they could have carried the night.

The Town Hall was packed, standing room only. So, I had to keep dancing to give my hip some physiotherapy. Naturally the T-Rex Tribute band were great.

I nearly forgot to tell you, our friend Brian (my Fling it Here, Fling it There co-star) had been pressured into local village hall duties. Of course being the good friend that I am, I rang his mobile phone and let him here the music. Within fifteen minutes Brian appeared in the doorway with a big smile on his face.

During the interval we all enjoyed yummy chocolate cake courtesy of Andy.
Thanks Andy! It was delicious.

Needless to say I am suffering today with my hip, and am in agony sat here typing this! But it was well worth it ;-)

Monday, 18 February 2008

Countryside Pursuits!

Full Moon or Uranus?
I wasn't sure whether I should tell you about this........but I will 'cos it was funny.

Yesterday, while Sat Nav and I were out for a walk with our dog Jack, we came across a walker who was stood looking at his map. He had just climbed over the style from a field and was standing in the grass close to the roadside.

We knew he was not alone, that he had a female companion with him, because we'd seen them walking across the field towards the style. Plus, they were wearing bright red jackets, so couldn't really be missed.

It's not unusual for us to see lots of walkers around here, and they are invariably chatty. This guy was no exception. As soon as we were alongside of him, he spoke and deliberately engaged us in conversation. He left us no alternative but to stop and chat, and being the polite pair that we are, we did just that.

His female companion did not appear over the style though, but stayed behind the hedgerow - which I thought was a bit odd.

I soon found out why!

Remember, it's winter here in England, and the hedgerow is very thin - actually skeleton thin!

While we were discussing the delights of the warm weather, something attracted my attention through the hedge. There was a flash. I couldn't believe my eyes...why was I seeing a full moon in the middle of the day?...the female (who was still behind the hedgerow with her back to me) suddenly pulled down her trousers, and YES, you've got it - she proceeded to have a pee!!! But did she know that she was doing it in full view for all to see?????
Somehow I don't think so ;-)

I snook a glance at Sat Nav and her expression said it all! Then I had a tremendous urge to cover Jack's eyes lol!!!

Meanwhile, said man is still rabbiting on seemingly oblivious to the fact that his companion is relieving herself not three feet away lol!

How I kept a straight face I'll never know - needless to say Sat Nav and I couldn't look at each other until we were well out of earshot!

Now I know what the term 'Ring around Uranus' means lol!!!

Hope this little tale brightens your day!

Friday, 15 February 2008

Masham Players Spring Production 2008

Our spring play for 2008 is the gentle comedy "The Bolt Hole" by Langton
Smith. This is a three act play set in an isolated farm house on Dartmoor
and has a cast of four women and five men.

The reading for the play was held in January and was well attended. Since
then rehearsals have been progressing steadily with a good deal of fun and
laughter. In addition to 'old hands' we are pleased to welcome a new
producer, Susan Rouse, plus four newcomers to the Masham stage.

We wish them all the best and feel sure that they will all enjoy their first experience of "treading the boards" at the Town Hall . . . and we all know what that feels like ;-)

Venue: The Town Hall, Masham, North Yorkshire.
Performance dates: March 13th, 14th, and 15th.
Curtain up at 7.30pm. sharp!
Tickets on sale from Marsden Pharmacy, Market Place, Masham, during normal business hours.

Thursday, 14 February 2008

Blood Pressure!

Well . . . I have been back to my GP for my results today.

You will all be delighted to learn that my heart is beating just as it should. My bad cholesterol level isn't too high; I just need to keep a watchful eye on my diet. The muffins are still off limits though ;-(

As for the smoking . . . well, I will try my very best to stop!

There is one little irritation that needs some attention - no, not Gloria (or Sat Nav as some of you will know her) . . . how could you all think that lol!!!
It seems my blood pressure is misbehaving, and very soon I will have to use a monitor for a week. And then yet another visit to my doctors . . . but what chance do I stand when they insist on playing such awful music in the waiting room! Bring on the rest and relaxation cd's PLEASE!

Monday, 11 February 2008

Life's a Beach!

To celebrate the sunshine and a special date in our personal calender Sat Nav (Gloria) and I decided to have an away day. Because we live in the heart of the countryside we thought it would be nice to go to the beach for a change. Sat Nav had a yearning to see the sea. So we packed the car, told our dog Jack that he was in for a treat, and headed off to Filey.

As you probably know things never go as smoothly as one would wish in our camp! Our journeys are legendary.
Yesterday, Sat Nav was on good form until we reached a roundabout complete with diversion signs, that we hadn't seen until we were ready to come off the roundabout at the wrong exit. Sat Nav got in a flap when I said, 'a trip to the opticians might be in order!'

What followed was a very interesting and totally bloody confusing detour, zig zagging through an industrial estate, a large housing estate, ending up in a Morrisons petrol station.

Sat Nav went in to ask for help and the extremely kind and helpful cashier who used to live in Filey gave her perfect directions to get us back on course. A big THANK YOU is in order here.

We arrived at Filey expecting to see a deserted beach and a handful of people. Despite the sunshine it's still winter. So you can imagine our total shock to see that the world and his wife were there, complete with a nation of dogs and hardly a parking space to be found.

Of course we did find one because I always believe that I will and set out to join the throng.

We enjoyed a walk along the beach, were intrigued by the sculptured cliffs and the happy holiday atmosphere. Jack wanted to be everywhere at once, and he couldn't understand why this big puddle could move. Although he's not one for getting his feet wet in normal circumstances, he was desperate to take a closer look at the North Sea and tried to take me with him ;-)




You'll be pleased to know that our journey home was without hiccups. And, as with all of the best story's, we drove off into the most beautiful sunset you can imagine.

All-in-all a truly special day - although at one point I was on the verge of sacking Sat Nav!

One more thing. Beware! Inflation hits Filey - make a note that the middle 'attended' toilets will cost you 40p for a pee!!!!!!!! So if you need to go, don't go here!

Saturday, 9 February 2008

Book Review

Beautiful Strangers book review by Victoria Oldham Victoria Oldham has written an interesting review on my novel Beautiful Strangers, that I hope you will find the time to read.

You can link to it Victoria's review

Victoria is herself an accomplished writer, and several of her articles appear on Suite 101. Check her out - you will not be disappointed.